I recently stood by a friend as she lost her friend to
suicide. As a loss survivor and a
friend, I was with her to offer her support.
I quickly realized that being a support also meant that I was there to
also help field the “why” questions.
The pain my friend sat with when fielding all the “why” questions
over and over was heartbreaking. In the moment
we have lost someone so close to us to suicide the only thing needed is love
and support.
I am here to tell you, the “why” doesn’t matter
anymore. That the “why” questions we all
have will never really be answered. We
have to accept that there was no one thing that takes a person to the place of
suicidal crisis. We have to accept that
we as curious human beings are not going get these answers and that we need to
keep our questions to ourselves.
What all the “why” questions do is look for blame and often
cause more hurt for the family and loved ones. The “why” questions you may have
are likely something they have already been asking themselves. What they need from you now is love and
support, not more questions.
